Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Was supposed to post this Tuesday

So, I'm sittin here at US Cellular...I'm working today for a few hours while my boss, Rachel, goes to a managers' meeting. I haven't actually worked here since October -- so I was super nervous that I would not remember vital things.

So far, only one customer has been in. But, crap...I forgot to press one stinkin' button and I spent about 30 minutes on the phone with customer service. And then I had to do a deposit on the same poor guy and that took a while of me looking for the sheet to jog my memory on how to start. I knew that if I started I could finish it, which I did.

He eventually had to leave because it was taking me so long. Left in a huff. O well...it happens right? Haha. He has to come back anyway.

So I've been thinking about what Justin was talking about last Saturday evening. About the one thing. Pretty "coincidental" that that was the subject after I've been thinking about it for so long!
Before coming in that night and watching the video Shells by Rob Bell I had never looked at being busy that way. In fact, there was a church sign by my house that said "If you're too busy to pray, you're too busy". I thought, and still think, that they have it wrong -- that you don't have to be in a "sacred" moment, because all moments are sacred. You don't have to be down on your knees in prayer - you can talk to God in the shower, in the car, watching TV, etc.

But, anyway, I always thought that being busy had two sides, or I could see two sides. On one hand it's like the Aerosmith song, "I don't want to miss a thing!" You have to get out there and do things to be fulfilled and happy! Achieve achieve achieve! Then on the other hand, God says to be still and quiet and know that he is God. So, it seems to me like there should be both, a balance! Like so many things in life.

But, after going in and watching how we can hold onto the shell fragments that prevent us from reaching something better like the starfish, it opened my eyes. I still can see my last viewpoint. But, now I guess I can see that I shouldn't be saying "yes" for the wrong reasons. Sometimes, I need to be able to tell someone, even if it's for a good cause, "no".

For me, it's the fact that I need to slow down and not take on so much, which is what happened in October when I quit US Cellular. I was in two important clubs, one of which I was helping to run. I had 17 hours at TU in a crazy schedule and I felt like I was giving all of my free time to the store on my time off from school. I think I've already relayed how I had a little mini-breakdown because I missed a Mortar Board meeting. So, I've come to the realization that it's ok to say no (which is going to be hard). I like to help people to the point of my own detriment. I can still help, but it should be different.

As school starts back up again, it's something that I need to keep in mind while I search for my one thing.


luke said...

I still think there's not just *one* thing ... or if there is just *one* thing it's gotta be something important and far-reaching enough that we can pursue it within the context of other things too. I dunno ... I just like to make things overly-abstract.

I think that's a smart move as you start school up again. Don't let it turn into your handful of shells. ;)

FHL_Always said...

I agree...I think that you can have many one things over a life time!