Monday, April 12, 2010

WEIRD ass dream

I had a dream last night that I was playing the viola in my college orchestra again...only this time I was sitting towards the back and no one would talk with me. I approached someone and asked why and they said that I was very snobbish, condescending and thought that I was a better player than everyone else.

Then I received my mid-semester feedback from the conductor who said that he placed me at the back of the section because I absolutely "sucked" on the first concert of the semester and that I sounded horrible (even though I had played great for the other concerts). I was mortified! I excused myself from rehearsal and went to the restroom. For some reason my stall locked, but it also had a second door that locked, because the first led to the other stalls. I was in a hurry so I blocked all the other stalls and locked myself in. A little girl with a short blond bob came into the bathroom and peered through the crack at me and knocked, then told me to hurry up.

Suddenly I realized that there were two more stalls, occupied by my friends who were lounging and eating lunch (weird I know). Why didn't she knock on their doors? So, when I was finished I opened the door and told her that it is very rude to look at people through the crack between the stalls. She mouthed back at me and I was SOOO angry at her. (Was I being condescending again?)

I attempted to make it back to orchestra, but was lost. Heading through hallway after hallway, going through classrooms filled with people, trekking across campus...I never made it.

So, what was this dream about? Am I condescending? Or is it that I've been told by my mother that I seem snobbish because I'm "shy" when really I'm thinking of what to say if you come up and talk to me. Why would the conductor question my playing? Why did the girl peek between the stalls? Why was I extremely angry at her? Is the little girl me? And why was I I feel "lost" in real life?

I believe that dreams are a representation/the result of our conscious thoughts and awareness that are made into unconscious stories to express things, possibly tell stories, possibly reflect our current states of well-being.

What do you all think? What is the interpretation? I need some guidance please.


Phyllis Renée said...

Gosh, I'm usually pretty good at interpreting dreams, but this one is confusing. I will tell you, though, I used to be shy around people too. I found out people thought I was a snob and that I thought I was "too good" for them. It was quite an eye opener.

Btw, it was great seeing you the other evening.

Kelsy said...

It was good seeing you too!

I wonder if I was projecting my friend onto my persona...I have a best friend that has been acting very condescending to me lately, acting like I'm her employee. I'm wondering if I was taking on her nature to see how it felt? I don't know...